Miracle Pill

Here I am fretting about trying to lose 30 pounds by November 1, the dreaded weigh-day tomorrow and letting everyone know how much weight I have lost or gained, and there it is in front of me – in lime green letters no less. The answer to my prayers.

As I was waiting in the checkout line of my local Food Lion, in the magazine rack was the solution to all my problems: DROP 27 LBS A MONTH, FAT JUST FALLS OFF. This is a 0.9 pound per day loss. By extrapolation I would only need 33 days to lose my 30 lbs. To accomplish this, according to the article I should be taking 5,325 IUs daily of Vitamin D. Of course the article does go on to state that the government set the “safe upper limit” of supplemental D at 4,000IUs daily in 2010. I sense a potential problem here.

The article goes on to state something to the effect that when taking D, you’re simply taking the precursor to the active hormone, blah, blah, blah, and our body decides how much it’s gonna make and how much you need to give it in pill form. According to the article “you have a huge safety window.” Oh by the way did I mention that they also give you some recipes to “jump-start weight loss?” Baked tomato omelet for breakfast, lunch is a tuna salad wrap using lettuce leaves not a tortilla, snack is orange slices dipped in melted dark chocolate, and dinner is 4 oz of pork tenderloin with 1 ½ cup steamed veggies. I am pretty sure if anyone ate that every day for 27 days they would lose weight and have an upset stomach from the massive amounts of Vitamin D!

So I have chosen the slow way to losing my 30 pounds, watching what I eat and exercising. I mean if I could do this in 33 days, my blog would be short lived and you would miss me. So basically I am doing it for you guys.

Breakfast was a business meeting at Cracker Barrel: 2 eggs scrambled, 2 biscuits, and 1/2 order of milk gravy

Lunch large bowl of cooked collards (Look 2 lines down to see why)

Naval orange

I have been in the most awesome book club at my church for over 5 years. We each have a month we pick a book and a restaurant  and we eat and enjoy libations to discuss the book. It is amazing how the books differ from month to month. I have read so many wonderful books outside what I typically would choose and have loved (most of) them. This month was my book and I chose, The Storied Life of AJ Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin and a local Mexican restaurant for our meal, so collards for lunch.

As I may have mentioned, I grew up on a farm where my dad raised collards, so I love collards preferably after they have had frost on them. I do not cook them to death.

Collards

This recipe was given to me many years ago by a lifelong Weight Watchers member.

 

1 large bunch collards (It may look like a lot, but they will cook down)

3 slices bacon (Omit for vegetarian or use the vegetarian bacon)

1 Tab brown sugar

1 Tab apple cider vinegar

1 tsp red pepper flakes (optional, more, or less)

  • Remove collard leaves from stalk and wash several times. I have always left the stem intact. They cook up quickly and provide a great source of fiber. Roll several leaves up together and cut into slices about 1/3 inch wide.
  • Bring 4 cups of water to boil in a large pot with bacon, snipped with kitchen shears into small pieces, brown sugar, apple cider vinegar, and red pepper flakes.
  • Once boiling add the collards. This may take a few minutes for them to wilt down to get them all in. Keep turning them with tongs.
  • Cook till desired doneness. Mine only took 10 minutes. Salt and pepper to taste.
  • These get better the next day.
  • Serve with hot pepper vinegar if desired.

This makes a large pot full, but we eat them until they are gone.

3 large tervis water and Metamucil. Yikes tomorrow is weigh day.

255 days to Disney Food and Wine Festival

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About rosestancil

I am your average 50+-year-old who woke up one morning wondering how and where the extra 30 pounds suddenly appeared came from. I am a Mom to two grown children, an Environmental Engineer (go Clemson Tigers), and a farm girl. I was raised on a green onion and collard farm in what was then rural Lexington County, SC. I still live on a part of the farm and hope to stay there. I have had a subscription newsletter, Green Onion & Collards for several years. I published recipes using seasonal local foods. I became a bit overwhelmed at the responses (I know, this should have been a good thing right?) and stopped it about a year ago. Some of the recipes I post will be from the newsletter. I will not count calories or eat lettuce. Girl gotta eat. I also will not give up good craft beer and wine, I will watch my portion size however. I intend to cook healthy, full of flavor foods, which will allow me to eat more, exercise at least 4 times a week (no gym or gym contracts), reduce and try to eliminate processed foods, and have snacks handy. I am a work in progress and will always be. If I am crazy enough to post my weekly weight, you need to be crazy enough to tag along on this journey.
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